Waiting

WAITING. It's like going anywhere in the middle of thick fog. You can't see a single thing that's in front of you, you have no idea where you're going, you're trusting you're heading somewhere amazing and you  just have to ...keep...moving...forward. 

If I'm honest I can be quite an impatient person. I think that's partially hereditary, partially society, partially my type-A personality's fault. But if I'm really honest, there are things in my life that I cannot control and all I can do is wait. One of my least favorite activities.

This season of my life is one seems more open ended than ever before: 

• Final year of undergrad
• Trying to figure out what happens after school...grad school, jobs, internships oh my!
• Praying for my living situation to pan out for next term (cause I'll be roommate-less after this one)
• Investing in relationship that must take a slower pace than we would like
• Financial "struggles" (aka doing more career related activities which=cut hours at work. boo)
• Dying to be involved in church
• Wanting to make music a part of life again
• Seeking a clear and specific direction for my life

I'm not shooting for the stars here am I? Yes,  I know there are quite a few things in that list that I can be proactive about, but despite my proactive attempts, I still have to WAIT on some Divine timing. Not always an ideal or fun process.


I live for plans. I love plans. I find joy in knowing exactly what's next. Though I'm not sure that's how God wants us to be. His desires our praise instead of our play-by-play. Our trust instead of our to-do list.

However, I don't doubt for a second that God's plan is present and I'm expectantly awaiting that to be revealed in due time. That doesn't necessarily make it easier but at least it removes some of my stress. Do I stress about it all? Yes. Absolutely.. I'm human. But lucky for me, Becca's-human-plans aren't what I'm desiring. Holy plans are on my radar.

I posted this verse in one of my first posts but just has resonated me this whole year ...all one and a quarter months of it.

This is exactly my heart and prayer. I pray that as I seek the Lord that He will give me the desires of my heart. Then, He can establish my steps as my plans and his plans coincide. It's a tricky think knowing the heart of God and His heart for my life. I don't think I'll ever quite get it down but I'll try as long as I'm blessed with a breath and a beating heart.

If any of you are pray warriors, and I suspect a few of you are (Mom I know you're reading this), I'd love if you would be praying along with me about all these various facets of my oh-so dynamic life. I have full faith this crazy plan will all unfold in time. I'll be ready to post praise reports as it's revealed [get excited!].

Praying you all have great rest of the week, feeling full of joy, love, and peace.